My clone

You know that feeling that the relationship isn’t right but leaving hurts too much? How you would rather stay then deal with him being in pain? How you wish you could hurt for him?

I don’t want him to be alone but I want more for me.

Sometimes I wish he’d cheat so that I’d know he has someone. I want to find my replacement and tell her he’s a good guy. I want to clone myself so that he has someone to get him soup when he’s sick. I wish I knew that he wouldn’t grow old alone. No one deserves to be alone.

I know why others stay. I know why they cheat. I just wish I knew how to walk away…


10 thoughts on “My clone

  1. Thank you for saying it so well. God knows I’m still struggling with this myself, but what has helped is thinking about whether it’s good for him to have a me around who isn’t feeling right about him and will never feel right again. But I don’t know if that will help for anyone else.

    1. Someone told me recently that, “we all have to be responsible for our own emotions.” It helps to keep in mind that he has to deal with his own pain and I have to deal with my own.

  2. If you figure it out let me know…, if you stay, it may get better for a while. But I can’t say that it ever gets back to 100%… The peaks come, but they aren’t as high… And the valleys tend to get deeper and wider.

    1. Thank you. I don’t think I have much of a question that I am leaving at this point.. but I am not sure how I will every figure out doing it without pain…


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