Grasping at Memories

I have always struggled to remember but these memories are even more fuzzy.  They are wrapped in pleasure.  They are clouded by a fog.   When I rack my brain to remember, I can only feel and grasp at moments.  Time eludes me.

There was a moment when I was on all fours.  I think he was spanking me.  I can’t explain how I felt.  Okay, that’s a lie.  I can.  I felt exposed and degraded.  I know that sounds harsh but the feeling is crystal clear.   The part that really amazes me is how turned on I felt.  I was on all fours like a dog and he told me to stick out my ass and arch my back.  I thrust back into him and he reminded me not to move.  He told me gently at first and then as an order.  “Keep your back arched and your ass out.”

The second orgasm was not what I expected. He used the crop on me but he caressed between hits.  It was incredible. He would hit me and I would writhe in pain and he would caress me and I would want to cum again.  I came with his mouth on me.  It was not like most orgasms.  My whole body went stiff.  It felt like it went on forever.  My legs hurt so bad and it felt like I was being sucked dry.  Everything I had was going into this orgasm.   My whole body surrendered.  I was exhausted and weak.  I didn’t like feeling so weak but he held me.

He blindfolded me and tied me down for round 3.  He put a plug in my ass.  He was gentle the first time.  The second time, he told me to push down.  I did and then stilled.  “You are not going quick enough,” he said.  The simple chastisement renewed my effort.  I begged to suck him and he let me.  He put me on my back and fucked my face.   He came in my mouth and carefully wiped away what I spilled.

After round four, we dressed for dinner and for me to go home. I was exhausted.  I couldn’t stop shaking.  I didn’t want to take care of myself.  I wanted to lay in a bath and be held.  I knew that leaving would mean being in control again.  I felt too weak.

The journey home was empowering.  I was knowledgable and careful.  I watched for danger but also smiled kindly at the family nearby.  My shaking stopped.  Watching myself as a powerful and knowledgable woman helped.  I was back in control.

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