The beginning

As the time drew nearer, I considered my choice. I don’t don’t know you well enough.  Somehow, I know that we will do this anyway.  You aren’t a dom.  You don’t  know this world.  You don’t seem afraid but you should be.  You should be reticent and annoyed at what I want you to do.  You are excited but I know it won’t end well.  I will get rebellious or realize that pain hurts.  You will get tired of being in charge and ask me to do the work.

The contract is a surprise.  There are rules that I don’t like but I want to submit fully.  I sign.  You tell me to remove my panties. Can I talk?  I peel them off and you take them.  I am instructed to play.  I know you want me ready and wet for you.  My heart is racing and I can’t focus on playing.  You touch me lightly and I shift to get more. I wish your hands were where mine are. We arrive and I strip in the entry way.  I thought this moment would be terrifying but I feel freed.  I awkwardly grab your hand when instructed.  I feel like a confused child as you walk me through the room.  You tell me to sit to be inspected.  I can feel myself moisten as you expose each part of my body and look closely.

We had talked about punishment.  I hadn’t told you I was afraid.  I knew I could take pain.  I have always been strong.  But what if it was just pain?  What if it paled in comparison to my fantasies?  You spanked me with a paddle, you used a crop, you used clamps, and clothespins.  You were patient and perceptive.  At times, I didn’t think I could take more and then I was on the edge of an orgasm as the sensations mixed.

For a passing moment, I wondered if my fantasies would still be enough to get me off…


5 thoughts on “The beginning

  1. Sometimes I feel like Mookie is more of a curse than a blessing! She has been with her Master for 5 years and is 3 years into her slavery. Sometimes she is a willing partner in crime and others a friggin Jiminy Cricket spouting what she thinks I NEED to hear instead of doing what I ASK and being a sounding board so I think think things out.

    1. Well, I am properly jealous. It would be really nice to have anyone who I could talk to outside of my master and blogs. On another note, I love your blog so far! I was just emailing it to my Master. I haven’t found many that reflect my thoughts well and yours is really well written.

    2. CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR!!!! Mookie may just show up on your door step -giggle- I love her becasuse we aer so a like but at other times I want to bash her head in!!! I am having a melt down and yet she has gone down the rabbit hole because she feels it’s BETTER for me to not have her…UGH!!! Sometimes it sucks to have friends who are as smart as you because you can’t trick them into painting a fence for you!

      Thank you, I write whats in my heart or on my mind and then don’t re-read so as to stay honest with the moment and myself and not edit to make it better for “others”. Honestly I forget to my Daddy reads my blog when I write :o)

    1. Thanks for stopping by! I love your blog. I can’t imagine having a friend who was going through this with me! You and Mookie are very lucky!

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